His Solace
by LittleMoonLover
Summary: [Sam&Josh] After the disappearance of the Washington twins everyone returns to their lives and tries to live them as normally as possible. But Sam can't seem to shake her new demons and turns to Josh Washington who seems to need her help just as much. Soon she becomes His Solace. (Complete summary within.)
1. Lost it All

**His Solace.**

 **Summary:** Everyone knows the story of the eight teens who reunited in the place where their two friends went missing the year before. But what many don't know is what transpired in the year in between these two tragedies. The relationship between the group's rock Sam and the older brother of the missing girl's takes on a new light at the two lean on each other for some kind of comfort with their demons.

 _Hello everyone! My name is LittleMoonLover and I have written several stories here on ! The Until Dawn series has intrigued me from the get-go and despite not having the money to afford the game I've watched several playthroughs and know the story pretty well at this point. So if there is any inconsistencies in this story I apologize, anything that is changed or modified in this story is either intentional or great for the story. Basically I just was really interested in the relationship between Sam and Josh-what happened in the year before to make them so close and just how close were they before Josh decided to betray them all? And what will happen when Sam is faced with a choice in the present day that could change her life forever? I hope you enjoy!_

 _Also: Each chapter will have a song title that helped me either write the song or something that inspired me to write it. Included will be lyrics at the beginning of each section!_

* * *

 **Lost it All - Black Veil Brides**

 _I'm just trying to breathe,_

 _Just trying to figure it out_

 _Because I built these walls to watch them crumbling down._

Sam watched as the cabin went up in flames, the sheer heat of it licking her face and warming her front while the cold bit at her back. Everyone else stood huddled together and watched it burn as the screams of the Wendigos-of Hannah-finally faded with their death's.

"Is it finally over?" Ashley's quavering voice asked over the sound of wood cracking and popping.

"I think so." Chris replied and put an arm around her and she leaned into his warmth and comfort. Somewhere deep inside Sam registered the new relationship with a mental 'finally', but then she registered what had been said and a face flashed through her mind.

"No. It's not over yet." She looked at everyone as they turned to her with confused expressions "Josh is still out there-somewhere-We've got to find him."

"No we don't need to find him." Mike stepped forwards "We don't owe that psychopath anything, he probably caused all this!"

But Sam was already turning back towards the forest "He's just as much a victim as you or I Mike. He needs help not to just be left in the woods."

"Sam! Come back!" Mike called as Sam broke out into a jog, disappearing into the blackness the last thing she heard from the survivors was "He's probably dead!"

Forty-five minutes later Sam stood at the edge of the mines. _I do not want to do this._ She groaned inwardly, her skin breaking out into goosebumps. It almost seemed like she knew these mines like the back of her hand at this point since she'd run through them enough in the last six hours.

"All the wendigos are gone Sam." she muttered to herself as she hunkered down onto the lip of the cave and slid down inside, pulling a metal bar with her-just to be safe.

"Josh!" she called shuddering as her voice echoed loudly off of the icy underground walls. A moment later a weak groan responded to her calls.

Following the noise Sam prayed silently that the groan was Josh and not another monster.

"Josh?" she asked as she rounded a curve, flashing her light around the small alcove until she found him curled up in the fetal position.

Her breath hitched in her throat and she hurried over to him, kneeling on the icy stone and rolling him onto his back. A finger pressed to his throat revealed that he was still alive, just unconscious, but his face was pinched with pain. Sam ran her hands down his arms and legs looking for potential injuries and found none.

"Josh?" she asked "Josh. I need you to open your eyes."

With a little groan his eyes fluttered open "Sam? Is that really you?"

A sigh of relief whooshed out of her but her relief was short-lived as Josh groaned with pain again, curling in on himself as if he was being tortured by some unknown pain. Sam watched in horror as Josh's body seemed to fade for a moment, replaced by a horrible monster, before phasing back into human.

"Oh god… Josh what happened to you?" She managed to gasp out.

"H-Hannah did something to me." The image of the wendigo-Hannah flashed painfully through Sam's mind.

"Well, how do we fix it?"

"I don't know."

Sam sat there for a few minutes with Josh cradled in her lap, she still didn't know why she was working to hard to save him-he'd tormented everyone for the first part of the night. But every time she tried to completely banish him from her thoughts an image of the past year would flash through her mind…

* * *

 _I said, "Then I lost it all."_  
 _Who can save me now?_

 _1 year ago…_

"Josh?" Sam knocked on the large, ornate front door that adorned the Washington's too-large home. "Josh. I know you're in there… please open the door."

It'd been two weeks ever since Beth and Hannah had gone missing. They'd stayed on the mountain for three days trying to help the search and rescue teams find the girls but eventually they'd been sent home. Beth and Hannah Washington were national news and everyone seemed to have an opinion on what exactly happened to them.

Sam had been trying to give Josh space but it'd been two weeks and no one had heard from him.

Sam leaned her forehead against the door "Please, just let me in."

A moment later, much to her surprise, the door clicked open and a grungy looking Josh peered out. His eyes had big dark bags underneath them and his cheekbones looked as if he was sucking them in. He looked at her with eyes that seemed almost lifeless.

"Oh Josh." Her voice cracked as she pushed open the door all the way and threw her arms around his shoulders. It was strange, Josh had always been the strong and confident one. Always protecting his sisters and, by extension, Sam.

He didn't react for a moment, standing rigidly in the doorway. But then his arms slowly slid around her and he was crushing her to him as if he was holding on for dear life. Josh's shoulders shook with silent sobs as Sam squeezed him tighter.

After what seemed like forever Josh finally released her before taking an awkward step backwards, sheepishly wiping at his wet cheeks.

"I'm not usually such a sissy." He spoke his first words since she'd last seen him.

"You're not a sissy." She replied curtly, wiping at her own tears, she looked around the living room which was a mess. Clothes lay everywhere, glass was shattered on the floor and one of the antique bookshelves was pushed over.

"Josh," she gasped with shock "What happened here? Did you do this?"

Josh shrugged, looking away guiltily. Sam set her bag down on the floor and rolled up her sleeves. "Come on we're going to clean this up before your parents get home."

"Fat chance of that." Josh's voice dripped venomously, "They haven't been home since the twins disappeared. I guess work is too important to them."

Sam's heart broke for him, it was true Jonathan and Marielle Washington did work all the time. How else could they afford all the opulence that surrounded them? But even now? With Beth and Hannah missing? She just couldn't believe it. "Everyone grieves differently…" She said softly placing a hand on his arm before tugging him towards the mess.

"Come on we'll clean this up and then you are going to take a shower while I try to get my hands on some food for you. I bet you haven't eaten anything in a couple of days have you? Didn't think so."

Thirty minutes later Sam shooed Josh away to go take a shower while she finished cleaning up the demolished living room. Some irreplaceable vases had been shattered but there wasn't much she could do about it now. Bending over to pick a picture frame up off the floor her heart plummeted through her feet when she saw the picture.

It was them, her, Beth, Hannah and Josh when they were about seven years old. They'd been taken to the beach that day by Sam's parents and her mother had insisted they all get in for a picture. Beth, who hated having her photo taken, glowered at the camera while a laughing Hannah through her arm around her shoulder. Josh was standing behind the girls giving Sam 'bunny ears' with his fingers.

Sam's legs shook as she sat down on the leather sofa and ran a finger over the twin's faces.

"That was Beth's favorite picture." Josh's voice made her jump as he emerged from his shower rubbing a towel through his wet curls.

"It _is_ Beth's favorite picture." Sam corrected him, refusing to even think about them being dead.

"Yeah."

Sam stood and set the photo back onto the shelf, "I ordered some pizza it should be here in a few minutes."

"Thanks but I'm not really hungry."

"You need to eat Josh, it's not healthy to just skip meals." Sam placed a comforting hand on his forearm and he shook her off.

"I don't need for you to take care of me Sam. I can handle myself."

"You obviously can't Josh." Sam replied, hurt by his rebuff.

"You know what Sam? You should just go. I'd like to be alone." He turned his back to her then.

Sam stood there for a moment with shock, he'd never pushed her away like this before. She debated staying and arguing with him-trying to get through to him some way some how. But instead she just decided to come and check on him again in a few days.

"Okay." She said with a whoosh of breath, "I'll go. But please eat the pizza if not for yourself but for me? I'd hate to see anything happen to you too. If you ever need to talk please… talk to me."

With that she turned and left, letting the door click shut quietly and leaving Josh in that massive house by himself.

* * *

 **Author's Note:**

 **I hope you all enjoyed the first chapter! There will be more to come when I have a free moment but I highly encourage all critiques and comments!**

 **Here is a little preview of the next chapter's song inspiration:**

 _I got all I need when I got you and I_  
 _I look around me, and see a sweet life_  
 _I'm stuck in the dark but you're my flashlight_

 **Have a lovely week everyone and don't forget to read & review! **

**\- LittleMoonLover -**


	2. Flashlight

**Flashlight - Jessie J**

 _I'm stuck in the dark but you're my flashlight_  
 _You're getting me, getting me, through the night_  
 _Kick start my heart when you shine it in my eyes_

Later on that night Sam lay in her bed, tossing and turning. After leaving Josh she'd gone home and moped around the house until her parents got back and then she hid in her room, not wanting them to ask about her day. Her parents had been overly worried about her ever since Hannah and Beth had disappeared and even though Sam hated keeping things from them she also didn't want to talk about what she was feeling to them either.

How could she tell them about the tornado of emotions that seemed to engulf her? She was doing her best to keep it together at school and had even begun to go out with the group again even if she was still harboring some lingering feelings of anger at the prank that they had caused. She'd seen the regret that shadowed their faces when they were together, it'd been a childish prank gone so wrong. The level-headed side of her told her to forgive them and she really was working on it.

But now she lay on her back staring at the ceiling and praying that sleep would find her soon. Unfortunately for her, everytime she closed her eyes she could see Josh's face which was familiar and foreign all at once. She didn't know how to help him anymore than she knew how to help herself.

As she mulled over the day the sound of a tap on her window brought her shooting up in bed with a thudding heart. Then, out of the corner of her eye, she saw a shadow peering in through her window and she nearly screamed until her eyes adjusted to the darkness and she could make out the features in the window.

Kicking off her sheets she hurried over to the window and opened it "Jesus christ Josh, you scared the crap out of me."

"Sorry." He said a bit sheepishly as he pulled himself over the window sill and into her room. Sam shut the window behind him to keep out the chill. "I just couldn't stay in that house anymore."

With a little sigh she turned on her bedside lamp, "It's okay, but maybe next time send a text before you decide to come tapping on a girl's window in the middle of the night."

"Will do." He shifted from foot to foot, looking a little awkward as he looked around Sam's room "It's weird, the last time I was in here you had frilly blankets and pink walls."

"The last time you were in here I was eleven." She reminded him as she sat on the edge of her bed, and nodding at the desk chair which he plopped into. "You were always too busy to hang out with us after you hit puberty. So did you want to talk about something?" She asked, still hurting from his rebuff from earlier.

Josh looked uncomfortable at her pointed stair "No-I-I don't know why I came here, sorry I'll just go." He got up to leave.

"Josh, wait." Sam grabbed his hand. "Come back… I didn't mean it like that."

He sat down again, this time on the bed next to her. They sat together in silence for a few moments, both wondering what to say or ask.

"How did we get here?" He finally asked, turning to look at her finally, his brown eyes imploringly looking at her for answers she didn't have.

"I don't know. I wish that we were any place but here. I wish that we'd never gone to the lodge and that Hannah had stayed inside rather than running out into the storm by herself."

"Me too." Josh agreed quietly, before leaning into her for comfort. "I wish I hadn't been drunk and passed out. I could have done _something."_

"You can't think like that. It's not going to help anything now." She clenched her fists, she felt the same way. She wished she'd been quick enough to stop Hannah from going up stairs to face that prank.

After that they sat there silently on her bed until the first rays of dawn began to shine through the trees and then Josh got up and left without a saying a goodbye. Somehow Sam knew that this was going to be a regular thing.

So when he tapped on her window the next night she was already awake and ready to let him in.

That night they talked about their childhood, which had largely been spent together. Josh's father and her own had been college buddies and had ended up deciding to move to the same city after graduating from school. Sam had been raised with the Washington's and had spent her summers at their various properties with her whole family.

"Do you remember when Hannah fell in that patch of poison ivy when you guys were ten and how she cried the whole way home until Beth started crying because she couldn't do anything to help?" Josh asked from his place on the floor, reclined against her bed.

"Yup I do." Sam said with a little laugh, she was laying on the bed with her head by his, "I also remember a certain big brother running and throwing himself in those bushes to try and make them feel better."

"Well it worked didn't it?"

"Yes it did, you always had a way to calm the two of them down even if it meant hurting yourself." Sam yawned as her eyes drooped.

"Sleepy?" He asked and she shrugged, she hadn't slept the night before.

"Just go to sleep, I'll let myself out." His lips were by her ear and the last thing she heard before she fell asleep was the sound of the window sliding open and then shut again.

* * *

 _When tomorrow comes_  
 _I'll be on my own_  
 _Feeling frightened of_  
 _The things that I don't know_  
 _When tomorrow comes_

A month and a half later Sam walked into her favorite coffee shop and scanned the room until her eyes fell on her friends.

"Sam!" Ashley hurried over to her and threw her arms around the blond "It's so good to see you!"

"Hey Ash, Chris. How are you guys?" Sam looked between them, as always they were the first to arrive. Probably so they could spend time in each other's company before everyone else got in the way.

"We're doing good." Chris said giving her a hug too, despite his assurances he looked a little thin and tired. He had been passed out with Josh that night, he probably felt some of what Josh was feeling. "Hey this may be a stupid question," he began as they headed back to the table "But have you talked to Josh at all?"

"Um, yeah. Yeah I've talked to him." Sam replied slowly, not wanting to reveal the fact that he snuck into her room every night. People would take it the complete wrong way. "Why?"

"Well he hasn't returned any of our calls." Ash sniffed while sipping her latte. "We get that he needed some space but it's been a month and a half since Hannah and Beth went missing, it might be time for him to emerge from that massive house."

"Ashley…" Chris gently rebuffed her and she seemed to realize how insensitive her words were.

"Sorry." She apologized somewhat sheepishly "I always seem to put my foot in my mouth don't I? Anyways. Lets change the subject."

She began to chatter about the drama that was unfolding between Emily and Mike and how they seemed to be on the verge of a breakup and Chris chimed in with his own comments here and there. Sam was only half listening, as she stirred her coffee.

Josh really hadn't talked to _anyone_ since the incident? The thought bothered her. Alot. Especially since Chris was his best friend.

Later on that night when he tapped on her window she slid it open and blurted out her frustrations "I saw Chris and Ashley today. They told me you haven't talked to anyone since we got back. Is that true?"

Josh stepped into the room and sighed as she slammed the window shut behind him. "It's true. I haven't talked to any of them."

"Josh! They are worried about you, they want to know if you're okay."

"I don't want to talk to any of them, they pulled the prank that caused all of this." Josh had that foreign expression on his face again, it was a mix between anger and something more wild.

"Even Chris? Who had nothing to do with that whole stupid prank in the first place?"

Josh didn't answer, his expression became shuttered, not letting her know what he was feeling.

With a heavy sigh Sam made a quick decision and opened her window and pointed into the night "Get out."

Shock registered a crossed Josh's face "What do you mean Sam-"

"Get out." She repeated herself and the words almost physically hurt to say. "You can't isolate yourself and I won't stand by and let you. You need to try and forgive them Josh they are stupid kids who didn't realize that their actions could have repercussions like this. You need to stop hiding in your house or hiding with me and come back to us."

"Sam…" He began to reach out for her but she took a step back.

"Go."

With one final look at her he climbed through the window and was gone.

* * *

 **Author's Note:**

 **Yay! Chapter two is finally done! I had to rewrite it a couple of times because I wasn't sure what I wanted to add and where to go since I have a beginning result and an end result in mind it's just the middle parts that I haven't decided just yet. I think that what I really want to convey is Josh's anger towards the group because of the prank I pulled and also I think that Sam has her own anger towards them even if she won't quite admit it yet.**

 **As always a quick sneak peek of next chapter's song!**

 _And all I can taste is this moment_  
 _And all I can breathe is your life_  
 _When sooner or later it's over_  
 _I just don't wanna miss you tonight_

 **Anyways I hoped you enjoy and will continue to enjoy! Please read and review!**

 **\- LittleMoonLover -**


	3. Iris

**Iris - The Goo Goo Dolls**

 _And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming_  
 _Or the moment of truth in your lies_  
 _When everything feels like the movies_  
 _Yeah, you bleed just to know you're alive_

"Sam come on. Please come out to dinner with everyone? We haven't done anything together since…" Chris' voice trailed off over the phone.

It'd been a week since she'd kicked Josh out of her room and he hadn't come back or spoken to her since then. She'd tried to go about her week like normal, but she missed talking to him at the end of every day. _But you were enabling him._ She reminded herself resolutely as she shifted her cell phone from one ear to the other.

"I'll go." She finally agreed, "But tell Mike and Emily to be on their best behaviors. I get that they just broke up but if they really both want to come then they need to be nice to one another."

"Yeah, sure but telling those two to behave is like telling a forest-fire to stop burning."

"Ha-ha." Sam shot back dryly "I'll see you all tonight, okay?"

Later on that night Sam stepped into Manici's, the group's longtime favorite place to eat. She headed to their usual table and was surprised to find it empty.

"Sam! Over here!" Jessica's high pitched voice called from behind her. The group was sitting at a different table tonight.

Sam joined them, smiling. "Hey everyone! Whats up with the new table?"

Everyone rose from their seats to hug her and when Chris did he murmured in her ear "I asked for a different table since we don't have as many people anymore." Then he pulled away and let the next person hug her.

Sam bit the inside of her cheek as Mike pulled her into a bear hug and swung her around. "Sammy it's great to see you."

After everyone had hugged her-even Emily which surprised everyone-they all sat again.

"I thought you asked for a table for seven?" Sam asked, nodding to the empty seat beside her.

"Ah about that."

"Sorry I'm late everyone." The familiar voice made her jump and when she turned Josh stood behind her smiling at everyone.

"Josh!" Sam squeaked as everyone rose again to give Josh awkward hugs which he returned.

"I invited him," Chris said from his seat "Since he finally decided to picked up the phone."

"Yeah, sorry about that. I let my phone die and forgot all about it." Josh apologized sheepishly, taking his seat next to Sam.

As the conversation picked up around the table and they ordered Sam watched Josh out of the corner of her eye. He seemed completely different than the other times that she'd seen him. His formerly bright and carefree attitude from before Hannah and Beth had disappeared had seemed to resurface. At first she thought all traces of the emotionally distraught young man had gone. But when Jessica asked a question about how the search in the mountains was going everything went silent at the table. When a hand grabbed hers under the table Sam nearly jumped but when she glanced down she saw that it was Josh's hand tightly squeezing hers.

"It's... going. They haven't found them yet but they are going to expand their search." Josh said slowly looking around at the silent table.

"Josh... We're really sorry for what happened that night. I don't think we ever got the chance to say that to you." Ashley babbled from her seat next to Jessica. "We didn't mean for the prank to hurt anyone."

"Ash. Shut up." Emily snapped from her seat and Ashley fell silent. Chris looked as if he was about to come to Ashley's defense but was cut off by Josh.

"Guys, calm down." He said calmly, but his hand squeezed Sam's even tighter as he went on "It's all water under the bridge at this point. I know you didn't mean to hurt Hannah."

They looked like they wanted to say more but were cut off by the waiter serving their food.

An hour later everyone stood outside shivering as they said goodbye to each other.

"You have to come out with us more often Sam." Ash said as she squeezed Sam in a big hug. "Theres a party in a couple of weeks you should come!"

"I'll think about it." Sam squeezed her back and waved as she got into Chris's car a long with Jessica, Emily and Matt. Mike drove past in his growling truck and honked as he left the parking lot after Chris. Suddenly it was just Josh and Sam standing in the frigid air.

"Hey." She breathed as she turned to him.

"Hey." He replied back, his breath curling through the air. "I'll walk you to your car?"

She nodded and they set off a crossed the parking lot, "Josh-I just wanted to say that I'm sorry for the way I treated you last week. You didn't deserve that."

"Don't apologize Sam. Especially since you were right about me hiding from everyone."

"But you still have a hard time being around them. I can tell Josh."

Josh sighed loudly, "You're right I do have a hard time being around them. But that just means that I need to get over it and being near them will help. 'It's not their faults that their prank caused all of this'. Remember?" He said using his best Sam impression.

He sounded so reasonable that Sam had to believe him "Okay... in that case you get to come with me to that party in a couple of weeks."

"Sounds good to me, we'll party like we're pornstars." he waggled his eyebrows at her as he quoted a line from one of his favorite movies and she couldn't help but laugh at that.

"You're going to be okay Joshua Washington." She said as they neared her car, "Just fine." She stood on her tip-toes and pressed a kiss to his cheek before she got back into the car drove away.

* * *

 _And I don't want the world to see me_  
 _'Cause I don't think that they'd understand_  
 _When everything's made to be broken_  
 _I just want you to know who I am_

"Come on Jess are you almost ready?" Ash asked as they all sat on the blond's massive bed and waited for her to be ready for the party.

"Almost!" She called in a sing-songy voice and Sam wondered for the hundredth time why she agreed to go to this party. It was one of Mike's soccer team's parties and as usual it was looking to be a complete rager.

Sam and Ash sat together, Sam wearing a pair of black jeans and a dark blue spaghetti strapped blouse and Ash wearing a pair of leggings with a tunic-like purple shirt.

Emily on the other hand was pacing the room, her high heels clicking on the smooth hardwood floor. She looked great (as usual) in a blood red halter top that tied around her neck and left he back bare and a pair of hip hugging jeans. "Jess-i-ca if you take any longer we'll all be old and gray by the time we actually get to the party!" She called, banging on the bathroom door.

"Okay, okay jeez Em. I'm ready lets go." The bathroom door opened and Jess appeared wearing a pretty white cotton dress with her soft blond hair flowing down her back in soft waves.

"What do you think?" she asked twirling around the room.

"I think you're going to freeze your ass off." Emily crossed her arms and tapped her heel "But it's too late to change-grab your coats everyone and _maybe_ we can make it on time."

Jess obeyed Emily, looking a little deflated as she pulled a light pink coat over her dress. Sam, feeling bad for the other blond, linked her arm through Jess's "I think you look amazing." She assured her and was rewarded with a grateful smile.

As they pulled up to the large house where most of the soccer jocks lived on campus Sam could hear the audible thump of the bass. People milled around on the lawn, catching a breath of fresh air or passing around a joint.

After getting out of the car Emily led their group into the house they chucked their coats into a small closet in the foyer and threw themselves into the throng looking for the rest of their group. It didn't take them long to find them since as always they were the center of attention. Matt and Mike were going shot-for-shot with one another as Josh and Chris cheered them on.

"Already drinking without us?" Emily commented loud enough to catch their attention and struck a pose, flipping her short black hair.

"Well you guys were late." Matt said, his eyes gluing themselves onto Emily's slender form, "You look great Em." He said appreciatively.

Emily preened for the jock, but her eyes searched for Mike to see his reaction. Unfortunately he wasn't looking at her, his eyes had found Jess's and he looked like he was at a loss for words.

"Well. On that note." Sam finally said, breaking the awkward tension and moved towards the group.

Chris grabbed her hand and playfully twirled her around in a quick circle. "Damn blondie, you look hot." he teased before releasing her, she stumbled a little bit but was stabilized by Josh's hands on her shoulders.

"Thanks blondie," she shot back "You look pretty nice yourself. Doesn't he Ash?"

Ash stuttered something that no one could hear as her ears turned bright red and she stumbled off saying something about getting a drink.

"You shouldn't tease her so much." Josh had to lean close to talk to her over the thumping of the music.

"I think it's cute that she likes Chris so much. Especially since he obviously returns the feelings."

"Too bad neither of them will ever make the first move. Can I get you a drink?" He asked, turning to the make-shift bar where what looked like thirty or forty bottles of alcohol sat.

"Hmm..." She thought about it for a moment, "I think I'll mix my own drink-you always put to much alcohol and it knocks me on my ass time and time again."

"I call it the Washington Whammy." He grinned but let her mix her own drink.

They soon found a couch to sit on as they watched the party-goers dance and laugh together. Sam sipped her drink as they sat in silence and watched their friends interact, Mike and Jess were dancing together as if no one else in the room existed-it would cause problems later Sam was sure of it-and Emily was standing on the sidelines looking angry and hurt. Suddenly Emily turned to the person next to her who turned out to be Matt and pressed her lips to his as she dragged him out onto the dance floor.

"Ah geez." Josh said from next to her "They don't think about consequences much do they?"

Sam looked sideways at him, his words making her frown. "Are you really okay with being here Josh? I know you're still uncomfortable with being around them and we can-"

"It's really okay Sam, don't worry so much. It's getting better-being around them I mean. They are just idiot kids who made a mistake. Now," he stood and grabbed two shots of a golden brown liquid off of a platter that someone was carrying "Drink this and lets dance."

She looked from the shot glasses in his hand to his face before accepting and clinking her glass to his. The whiskey burned so badly that she gasped, "Oh my god that tasted so bad." she coughed as Josh thwacked her on the back laughing.

"C'mon Sammy." He teased as he pulled her onto the dance floor. Soon all Sam could feel was the thumping of the music and Josh's hands on her hips as they swayed with the quick beat. Chris and Ash joined them soon and so did the rest of the group. As everyone danced together Sam laughed, her alcohol hazed brain feeling more free than she'd felt in months. For some reason as she looked from face to face she got an overwhelming feeling that everything was going to be okay from that point on.

She didn't even notice the tears at first, Josh did. He had turned from doing a stupid little dance with Chris and saw the wetness on her cheeks. He didn't say anything or ask any questions, he simply grabbed her hand and tugged her off of the dance floor and up stairs where it was quieter. It took them a minute or two to find a room that wasn't otherwise occupied but when they did Josh pulled her inside and shut the door, nearly cutting off the sound of the music.

"What wrong?" he asked as Sam wiped at her tears in vain.

"Nothing," she sniffled not wanting to worry him further. "It must've just been too loud or something."

"Bullshit. Sam I know you better than that. What. Is. Wrong."

Sam sighed and plopped down onto the bed "I forgot about them." she finally replied quietly.

"About who?" Josh asked as he sat next to her.

"Hannah and Beth. When we were all dancing I thought 'everything is going to be okay' and I was so happy and then I remembered their faces. How could I forget about them?" Sam's voice hitched on the last word and a fresh wave of tears overcame her.

"Sam, look at me." Josh put his hands on both sides of her face using his thumbs to flick away her tears "You're not forgetting them. Trust me. No one is going to forget them. Least of all you-your heart is too big for that."

Sam didn't believe him. Now that she remembered Beth and Hannah their faces played through her mind like a broken record, Hannah's tear streaked face as she ran into the blizzard and Beth's brave one as she followed her sister.

Cursing under his breath Josh leaned forwards, her face still cradled in his hands, and pressed his lips gently to hers.

* * *

 **Author's note:**

 **So you guys asked for longer chapters and I hope I delivered in this chapter? A lot happened thats for sure but I don't intend for this to be a super long story anyways. I just really hope that I'm setting all of this up correctly since I know that Josh and Sam were simply 'close' in the game and nothing more than that (but screw that), in this version they are more than that and they can lean on each other for support. Even though Josh isn't really leaning on her as much as he should. In my head I can't help but wonder when he started to plot the entire Lodge reunion, as a writer I have an idea but it was never definitive in the games. ANYWAYS.**

 **As for the rest of the group I wanted to expand more on the archetypes of the group since in the games Mike proved to be a loving savior-type of person that should be seen in the story and Emily herself-though blunt and rude-still wants to be with her friends. Ash and Chris are pretty straightforward since, in my opinion, the game focused on them quite a bit if they were both kept alive.**

 **Here is a sneak peek of the next chapter's song:**

 _But suddenly there's no more clouds_  
 _I believe without a doubt_  
 _That heaven sent an angel down_  
 _And then she turned my life around_

 **Please read & review!**

 **\- LittleMoonLover -**


	4. Refuge (When it's cold outside)

**Refuge (When it's cold outside) - John Legend**

 _I pray for better days to come_  
 _I pray that I would see the sun_  
 _Cuz life is so burdensome_  
 _When everyday's a rainy one_

Soft lips. That was all Sam could think about as she sat at her computer trying in vain to write a paper on ethics. Leaning back with an exasperated sigh, she closed her eyes and was transported back into that room-she could even smell the smell of alcohol permeating throughout the house.

" _What was that for?" She'd asked when he finally pulled away, her cheeks flaming._

" _It was a thank you for not forgetting and for feeling bad when you thought you did-and for feeling bad even though you had nothing to do with that stupid prank." Josh shrugged as if he were bad at explaining himself._

" _Chris had nothing to do with it and I don't see you kissing him." Sam pointed out, wiping at her still damp cheeks._

" _Well, remind me to kiss him later then." Josh replied grinning sardonically. Sam opened her mouth to say something else, but was cut off by the door to the room bursting open and a very drunk Emily stumbling inside._

" _Sam! There you are-I've been looking all over for you." Not reading the situation at all, she threw herself down on the bed between Josh and Sam and slung herself over the blond's shoulders._

" _Can we leave? I can't handle this. I can't believe Jess would do this!" She babbled tearfully as Sam patted her on the back. Emily rarely cried, in the five years that Sam had known her the girl had always been headstrong and usually preferred to lick her wounds in private, by herself. But here she was blubbering in front of not one, but two people. It was definitely time to get her out of there._

 _She looked helplessly over Emily's shoulder at Josh who smiled sheepishly at her and shrugged "We'll drive Jess and Ash home."_

" _Thank you Josh." Sam sagged with relief as she helped Emily out of the room and into her car._

After that Sam had driven a crying Emily home and had gone home to toss and turn all night with memories of the kiss.

It'd been two days since then and she hadn't spoken to Josh at all. In fact she'd hidden away in her room with excuses to everyone else about being buried in a pile of homework. While that wasn't completely false she had barely gotten anything productive done. Everytime she sat down to do homework she would start to think about the kiss and get completely sidetracked.

What frustrated Sam the most was the fact that she _wasn't_ one of those girls. The girls who would let a guy overwhelm and fluster them so much that they couldn't even function.

"Can't focus huh?" A deep voice said from behind her and Sam whirled around to see Josh standing in the doorway to her bedroom.

"Did you climb in through the window…?" Sam asked, her cheeks burning as her eyes flicked over to the closed window.

"No I knocked on the door and your mom let me in, like a regular human being." Josh plopped himself down onto her bed "So, any reason that your thoughts are escaping you?" He grinned devilishly.

"No. No reason." Sam replied letting her temper get the best of her. It seemed that more and more of Josh's playful personality was coming back to him. She turned back to her computer and pretended to be reading over her paper.

"Really?" his voice was right next to her ear and she jumped, her head swivelling until she was looking straight into his face. Pulling back Sam stood and crossed the room, his closeness had flustered her.

"Uh-uh, nope. No. Josh you don't get to ignore me for two days after that." She shook her head as if to try and shake away her blush.

"I was just giving you time to mull over it Sam. I like you, thats what I didn't get to say before Emily burst in. I've never felt more comfortable with anyone before."

"I…" Sam looked at her feet "I don't want you to like me just because I've been your support ever since Hannah and Beth went missing."

Josh closed the gap between them and drew her in, pressing his soft lips to hers. Sam melted under his hands and after a few minutes he pulled away. "Do you think it would feel like that if I liked you just because you were kind to me?" he asked, sounding as breathless as she felt.

"No I don't." Sam finally replied not meeting his eyes "But I also don't want what happened to Hannah and Beth to be a shadow on whatever this is."

His brows came together with concentration as he tried to think of something to say, finally he places a finger under her chin and brought her eyes up to meet his. "I can't promise that it won't have anything to do with them. You know I can't. But we can try, right?"

Sam leaned into the warmth of his fingers, despite all of the things that could go wrong and the many ways that she could get hurt she stood on her tiptoes and

kissed him.

* * *

 _But suddenly there's no more clouds_  
 _I believe without a doubt_  
 _That heaven sent an angel down_  
 _And then she turned my life around_

 **3 months later, June.**

 **6 months since the disappearance of the Washington twins.**

"Uhg it's so hot." Jessica complained as she rolled over in her patio chair. Everyone was at Josh's house spending the day by the ornate pool that rarely got any use.

"Then why don't you cool off?" Mike asked as he easily plucked her up from her table and sent her flying through the air until she landed in the pool with a splash. She came up sputtering and shrieking as everyone laughed.

"Mike you jerk!" She screeched as Mike cannonballed into the water splashing her as he did so.

Sam sat with Josh on one of the lawn chairs as they watched their friends rough house in the pool. Three months had gone by since they'd started dating and even though everyone around them had reacted differently it had been a blissful three months.

"Ash be careful!" Sam called as Ashley ran by screaming and giggling as Matt and Chris chased her around the pool.

"It's fine Sam! Don't get your bikini bottoms in a twist." Ashley called back as she dove into the pool.

Shaking her head Sam stood and turned to Josh "I'm going to go and get something to drink." She waggled her eyebrows at him before heading inside. When he appeared fifteen seconds later she grinned, "Glad you got my message."

"Mhm." He gripped her hips and brought her in to kiss her smiling mouth.

Looping an arm around his neck Sam squealed a little bit when he lifted her off of her feet into the air, "Stop that!" she laughed as they twirled around the kitchen.

The sound of approaching laughter brought them back to reality, with a sneaky look Josh pushed Sam into the hall and into the downstairs closet just in time as the entire group came in for refreshments.

"I thought Sam was getting something ready?" Sam heard Jessica's voice float through the door and she had to clap a hand over her mouth to keep from giggling as Josh peppered kisses up and down her neck.

"You know how to make yourself some lemonade Jessica." Emily's sullen voice followed as their voices faded.

"Why'd you shove me into a closet?" she asked when it was safe to talk again, "It's not like we haven't kissed in front of them before."

"Yeah but I can't do this in front of them." He shoved her up against the shelf and kissed her roughly, his tongue delving into her mouth.

"Oh yeah?" she finally gasped, looking up at him with heated eyes and nipping his lower lip. "What else can't you do in front of them?"

His answering grin was all that she needed.

Two hours later after they'd shooed their friends away they lay in Josh's bed. Sam traced patterns on Josh's collarbone as he slept. The bags under his eyes were still there, though not at bad, he would toss and turn at night plagued by nightmares and when he would wake up he wouldn't let her touch him.

"Are you enjoying yourself?" he muttered, surprising her, and his eyes fluttered open revealing their hazel depths.

"I always enjoy myself." she replied with a kiss to his chin.

"Okay I'm going to take a shower, we'll watch a movie when I get out." he sat up and pressed a quick kiss to her lips before rolling out of bed, Sam admired his form as the door shut.

Sam rolled over in bed and grabbed her phone as it chimed, she'd missed a call from Emily and had gotten several texts from Jessica. It turned out that the two got into a fight on their way out of Josh's and both wanted her to listen to their side of the story. Sam rolled her eyes and put her phone on the bedside table where it promptly slipped off and clattered to the floor.

Grumbling Sam leaned down to snatch her phone up off the ground but her eye caught the edge of a book on the ground peeking out from underneath the bed skirt. Curious she pulled it out and she saw Hannah's name scrawled on it with a date.

Sam ran her fingers over the cover of the diary, she hadn't seen this since before they'd gone to the Lodge. She would often see Hannah scribbling away in it.

Flipping open the diary at random she read:

 _October 29th_

 _I really think Josh is doing better now that he's out of the hospital. I saw him today and he seemed better. He's pretty upbeat, but he talked like he's been doing therapy for such a long time. I guess I didn't know. Mom and Dad never let on. Funny how you can not even know your own brother. I kinda need a good cry thinking about how lonely he must feel..._

Sam frowned with confusion, therapy? She hadn't heard about that. She remembered last year when Josh had been in the hospital for a while but everyone had been told he'd had surgery and was recovering.

A sick feeling filled Sam's stomach as she shoved the diary back under the bed when she heard the water turn off. When Josh emerged in a cloud of steam rubbing a towel on his hair Sam jumped guiltily.

"Everything okay?" Josh asked as he pulled on a pair of pajama pants. "You look like you've seen a ghost."

"Fine." Sam said trying to push her discovery to the back of her mind. It wasn't any of her business that Josh was in the hospital for mental illness… was it?

She tried to get the thought out of her mind but as she lay curled in Josh's arms that night she couldn't help but wonder, was there anything else she didn't know about him?

 _When it's cold outside_  
 _There's no need to worry cuz_  
 _I'm so warm inside_  
 _You give me peace_  
 _When the storm's outside_  
 _Cuz we're in love I know_  
 _It'll be alright_  
 _Alright it's alright_

* * *

 **Author's Note:**

 **Hello everyone! Sorry it's taken me so long to update, I will try to finish this story as fast as possible since there isn't too much left that I want to do. Sam/Josh relationship definitely developed quickly in this chapter-which was intentional since the time lapse helps move the story a long quite a bit. I will also be adding a smut fic for some of this time at a later date, I just didn't want to add it in to this story since I didn't want it to mess with the integrity of the story.**

 **Additionally I got a couple of private messages about Jess's characterization which I totally get. I just think that Jess herself started out as a follower since that is how her and Emily became good friend (in my mind) and when she realized that she liked Mike she kind of threw that girl who would buckle under anything that Emily wanted out the window. She became confident and quite like another Emily in that aspect and it drew Mike to her. ANYWHO.**

 **A few more chapters to come!**

 **Please read & review!**

 **-LittleMoonLover-**


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